Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

I love how God is always bringing things together in my life. How He slowly and surely guides and directs my paths... leading me, guiding me, giving me new resources. I love how so many different things converge into one thing.... My life has been on a path of transformation for a while. I have gone from a person who struggled with what other people thought of her to one who is so enraptured by God that others opinions have greatly diminished. I have gone from a victim: of sexual abuse, of difficult circumstances to a hero of my own story who sees every challenge as an opportunity, every difficulty as another story to tell to encourage, serve and bless others and every suffering as a means to draw nearer to Christ. I have shed a lot of my perfectionistic tendencies for good enough... If something is worth doing, it's worth doing imperfectly. I am learning to run, literally. It's the craziest thing. I would never have seen myself as a runner. I'm not an elite athlete...

A part of me... a rather large part, at that, is tempted to say that I'm a failure! In some ways that is true. I have not been very successful in going down on the scale. BUT what I have been successful at is maintaining the same weight. This might not seem like a big deal but for me that is HUGE. I usually find that after a few months after having a new baby that I stop losing weight and start gaining. And I have not done that! I have held fast. I've been up and down a few pounds for the past, oh, about 6 months. BUT, I have not added 20 + pounds to my frame. And that, my dear IS SUCCESS! I'm excited though to move forward. I have recently (as of a few days ago) completely stopped nursing. There were a few reasons for quitting... and primarily they were for my health... The disadvantage is I "lose" all those extra points I got for nursing. The plus side though is that I know exactly the amount of points I truly have for each day. There's no if, and or ...

The kids are throwing pillows at each other. I've just finished another work-out and find their energy exceeds mine by ten-fold. I have been thinking lately about my struggles with eating, exercise, self-indulgence, self-control, etc. and thought maybe it best to write about it. To kind of get it out of my system. I've heard the best way to lose weight is by having some kind of accountability. So if I have accountability with myself and with others.. and if I write down what I'm doing and what I'm not doing... well, maybe it will help. I have read over the years and have been encouraged with the verses of Psalm 139:14 -being fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139 For the director of music. Of David. A psalm. 1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongu...