Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

So I've experienced week 2. A lot more energy which has been amazing! I've had my moments of fighting sadness and depression, which kind of surprised me. It's amazing what you feel when you're not eating your feelings. When you actually let things surface. I realized I was really upset when I got Samuel's INTACT clinic appointment reminder. INTACT stands for Individuals Thriving After Cancer Treatment. Most of his appointments don't knock for me a loop but this one does. We have to go over all the effects of the chemo and radiation. It can feel very scary and overwhelming and make me anxious about the future. But God doesn't call me to live in the future. He says He is I AM! Which means I need to be here. Right now. Present. Right where I am. So I had to work through that. I also went to a banquet dinner this week. I took the pears and blue cheese off my salad and ate the spring mix without dressing. I passed on the crostini and the hot rolls. I ate ...

Some days I just want to quit. I don't want to deal with the hassle of preparing food. I just want to drive-thru and say forget about it. Today especially packing and preparing to go the zoo with Michael and Peter. I mean I was already making sandwiches for them. Why do things different for me? Why not make a PB&J since I was already doing it? I mean if I fixed a salad for myself wouldn't I look hoity-toity amongst the other moms with their sandwiches and bags of chips? So I told myself. Just do it. Just keep doing it. Don't worry about what others think. Don't cave into the easy and simple. I fixed myself a salad and cut up strawberries and apples that I knew I could also share with the boys. Some almond butter to dip my apples in. I know some days I "fail". Sometimes I have setbacks. Sometimes I cave and have a dessert splurge or a sugary coffee drink with a friend. But the difference is I don't call it quits when that happens. I get right ba...

I recently purchased a bundle of e-books on home-making. Super steal. 97 e-books for $29.00 (a value of $640.00). In addition I also scored some free deals. A company called Cultures for Health gave me a free starter for yogurt. I got a Greek yogurt start for free and all I had to pay was three dollar shipping. I'm a fan of Greek yogurt. I love the thick tangy creaminess. I love drizzling it with honey and adding fruit. I enjoy the probiotics and the great amount of protein I'm getting. What I don't like is the cost. It's so expensive. So I'm branching out and making my own. Wish me luck. I'm super nervous because it seems really complicated. I never thought I would be one of THOSE women. You know, the kind that make their own yogurt. We'll see...

My husband recently came home from a trip and was enthused about us trying a new lifestyle... Primal Blueprint by Mark Sisson. (It's Paleo with a twist.) So we bought two books. Primal Bluepring and the 21 day total body transformation. I was amazed at how he talked about how we are killing our bodies with overproduction of insulin that causes us to store fat and have inflammation throughout the body. After reading the first book I was trying to decide when was a good time to start. This past Monday I decided enough's enough and I started. I cleared out the pantry. Gone went most of the carbs and other pitfalls to our new eating style. I still kept a couple of boxes of cereal for the kids and their granola bars, etc. I went grocery shopping and loaded the cart with fresh salmon, vegetable and grass-fed beef. I could tell detoxing from carbs was hitting me on Monday and severely on Tuesday. Headaches, dizzy, fever, sluggishness. I continued eating primal anyway. We have pe...

Mike and I have been faithfully following the Body-for-Life challenge for 4 weeks now! It hasn't always been easy and we haven't always been perfect but overall we're doing it and I feel like we're changing. Changing what we eat. Our exercise habits. Even what we drink. Coke is for our off day! I look forward to Saturday nights. We enjoy a 24 hr day off from Saturday evening til Sunday evening. It's part of the program. When I'm tempted to feel left out or deprived I will say to myself, "Hey, you can have it Saturday night or Sunday afternoon." Often by the time I get to my free day I couldn't care less. Must confess I'm excited my birthday falls on a Sunday... this Sunday.

Mike and I started a Body for Life 12 week challenge on May 1st. Day 8. We're doing really well. Keeping up with the exercises as well as diet. If I plan then I do well... and when I don't... well, I'm setting myself up to fail. So plan on. Plan on. Look forward to posting progress at 4 weeks. I've been inspired to read the stories and see videos that show people overcoming obstacles and making huge changes in their life.

So after playing the yo-yo game for a bit I had a change. I gained 15 pounds. Yippee. (said in monotone, flat ironic voice). Yeah, I got on this new medicine that was supposed to not affect my weight and bam... the pounds came on. This was discouraging after working out 3 days a week for an hour and a half a stretch (cardio & weights)... and the pounds came on. It wasn't like I felt like I was gaining true fat weight but just getting puffy everywhere. I think I had retained a ton of water. So, that happened and then I went nuts. I was like, "Fine, go ahead... if you're going to pile on me anyway then I'm going to enjoy it." So while in Florida I managed to eat ice-cream everyday and overeat in general. Silly, silly girl. Get back on the horse. We got home last night and today I already started back to exercise... and self-discipline. Eating good healthy foods full of protein, nutrients, vitamins, etc. I am praying and asking God to help me... help me t...

I was really somewhat proud of myself tonight. I enjoyed a salad and then had some stromboli... but I didn't go back for seconds. I ate slowly and purposefully... and it was delicious. We were celebrating the birthday of a dear friend of ours. I did enjoy a piece of the chocolate, chocolate cake.... and I finished eating before 8. I haven't been tracking what I eat physically but more mentally in my head. I want to get back in the habit of writing it down! I've been making some small changes... I hope they add up to big success!

I have recently made a commitment with a friend that I would not eat after 8. It's not a legalistic thing. It's just we both find that we tend to want to munch after 8. It's a great principle that I'm trying to stick to. I have set an alarm on my phone for 7:45 p.m. to remind myself that I'm not going to be eating in 15 minutes. This gives me time to eat a snack (usually a piece of fruit) in case I'm hungry. A nice cup of herbal tea is also another nice way to end the evening. Sometimes it's hard and I find that I have to drink a lot of water to get rid of the hunger pang. Another way to fight "temptation" is to brush my teeth and use mouth wash. I don't want to have to brush my teeth again and this is usually a good cue to my body that I'm done with food for the night. It feels good to tell myself "No!". In addition I find that I feel better upon waking in the morning.

One of my favorite things about my week starting on the week-ends (Friday)... in terms of weigh-ins and tracking...is that I get a good kick-start for the week-end. I know I can splurge some but I don't tend to overdo it... I made a big turkey dinner tonight. It was fun... it felt like Thanksgiving in February. But without the overeating. I enjoyed my food and i felt content, not stuffed. New thing to try. frozen fruit in my water for flavor.... mmmmm

So how did I do on my weigh in on Friday (the 7th)? Equivalent in weight of what I lost... 2.6 pounds! I must confess I was a little disappointed. I was hoping for something a little more drastic the first week... you know like between 5-7 pounds. BUT, I realized I'm losing weight healthier than I did in the past. My goal is consistency not dramatic results that just as quickly disappear and besides, I don't feel deprived. I even went away with Mike for an overnight... ate out twice (once at the Cheesecake Factory)... had desserts and coffee, etc. during the week and still managed to lose 2.6 pounds! Not only that but I can tell I'm losing inches. I feel it in my clothes! I can button up things I couldn't button up before. My jeans aren't cutting into my waist. I'm learning how to eat better so I'm satisfied longer... so I get the nutrition I need... and so I become healthier. I love it!!! I edited a recipe I love for banana chocolate chip muffins and made ...

A good day for following my new lifestyle. I even had a date with Mike and was able to plan how to use my points to the best advantage! Yay! I popped popcorn before we went to the movies. I had some clementines an apple and popcorn to get me through my desire to munch while I watch. I even had a McD's icecream cone... I don't feel deprived and I don't feel out of control with my eating. It's very nice.