Week TWO Down!
So I've experienced week 2. A lot more energy which has been amazing!
I've had my moments of fighting sadness and depression, which kind of surprised me. It's amazing what you feel when you're not eating your feelings. When you actually let things surface. I realized I was really upset when I got Samuel's INTACT clinic appointment reminder.
INTACT stands for Individuals Thriving After Cancer Treatment. Most of his appointments don't knock for me a loop but this one does. We have to go over all the effects of the chemo and radiation. It can feel very scary and overwhelming and make me anxious about the future. But God doesn't call me to live in the future. He says He is I AM! Which means I need to be here. Right now. Present. Right where I am.
So I had to work through that.
I also went to a banquet dinner this week. I took the pears and blue cheese off my salad and ate the spring mix without dressing. I passed on the crostini and the hot rolls. I ate my chicken and green beans and forewent the mashed potatoes. I said no to the cake and instead drank all my water and unsweetened iced tea.
My taste buds have changed so much that I kept asking Mike to make sure the tea was not sweetened because it tasted too good to me. WOW. I get excited about unsweetened iced tea!
I'm down 12 pounds (total of 22!). 12 pounds in two weeks is pretty stinking amazing! :) And did I mention it's that fabulous time of the month?! So I know I've got extra bloating at the moment. I've been irritable and raw at moments- definitely hormones at work. But I can honestly say I haven't had any cravings... which blows my mind.
This morning I made myself a "Mocha" shake. I took my chocolate shake pack and added 4 oz. cold brew coffee and 4 oz. unsweetened cashew milk, a cup of ice and blended! Delish! It really hit the spot. Just finished my delicious peanut butter bar and looking forward to a large salad for lunch out with a friend.
Still so surprised how doable this is.
Last night I had dinner with my in-laws. They ordered Chinese and in keeping with the program I ordered Moo Goo Gain Pan. It's chicken and veggies. But when it came I realized I couldn't have much of it. I could have the chicken and mushrooms. The other veggies were too high in carbs. So I went out and got a half size salad at Panera to complete my lean and green meal.
I'm so thankful that I'm learning to be flexible and adjusting to hiccups as they come up.
Grateful to God for working in my heart. One big area that has come up for me is do I really trust His provision? That's been something He's challenging me with lately. I've gotten really concerned how we're going to finish paying for my dental treatment (2 crowns- yikes), pay for the heating to get fixed in the house, fix the vacuum cleaner and the dishwasher, etc. I'm surrendering these things to God and trusting His perfect timing and provision.
I'm not doing it perfectly but I'm progressing in my trust in Him. Slowly, bit by bit, I'm relinquishing my false sense of control and putting myself in His hands. He is good. He is faithful. He is worthy of my trust and my praise.
So what seems like a very physical thing: changing my eating plan- has become a very spiritual, mental, emotional journey. I'm so grateful God is a Redeemer and that He's redeeming me!
Onward with Day 15!
I've had my moments of fighting sadness and depression, which kind of surprised me. It's amazing what you feel when you're not eating your feelings. When you actually let things surface. I realized I was really upset when I got Samuel's INTACT clinic appointment reminder.
INTACT stands for Individuals Thriving After Cancer Treatment. Most of his appointments don't knock for me a loop but this one does. We have to go over all the effects of the chemo and radiation. It can feel very scary and overwhelming and make me anxious about the future. But God doesn't call me to live in the future. He says He is I AM! Which means I need to be here. Right now. Present. Right where I am.
So I had to work through that.
I also went to a banquet dinner this week. I took the pears and blue cheese off my salad and ate the spring mix without dressing. I passed on the crostini and the hot rolls. I ate my chicken and green beans and forewent the mashed potatoes. I said no to the cake and instead drank all my water and unsweetened iced tea.
My taste buds have changed so much that I kept asking Mike to make sure the tea was not sweetened because it tasted too good to me. WOW. I get excited about unsweetened iced tea!
 |
| 2 WEEKS- 12 lbs down! |
This morning I made myself a "Mocha" shake. I took my chocolate shake pack and added 4 oz. cold brew coffee and 4 oz. unsweetened cashew milk, a cup of ice and blended! Delish! It really hit the spot. Just finished my delicious peanut butter bar and looking forward to a large salad for lunch out with a friend.
Still so surprised how doable this is.
Last night I had dinner with my in-laws. They ordered Chinese and in keeping with the program I ordered Moo Goo Gain Pan. It's chicken and veggies. But when it came I realized I couldn't have much of it. I could have the chicken and mushrooms. The other veggies were too high in carbs. So I went out and got a half size salad at Panera to complete my lean and green meal.
I'm so thankful that I'm learning to be flexible and adjusting to hiccups as they come up.
Grateful to God for working in my heart. One big area that has come up for me is do I really trust His provision? That's been something He's challenging me with lately. I've gotten really concerned how we're going to finish paying for my dental treatment (2 crowns- yikes), pay for the heating to get fixed in the house, fix the vacuum cleaner and the dishwasher, etc. I'm surrendering these things to God and trusting His perfect timing and provision.
I'm not doing it perfectly but I'm progressing in my trust in Him. Slowly, bit by bit, I'm relinquishing my false sense of control and putting myself in His hands. He is good. He is faithful. He is worthy of my trust and my praise.
So what seems like a very physical thing: changing my eating plan- has become a very spiritual, mental, emotional journey. I'm so grateful God is a Redeemer and that He's redeeming me!
Onward with Day 15!
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