Loving the girl in the mirror...

I woke up at 4 a.m. and couldn't go back to sleep. One of those wide awake mornings plus my sweet love snoring beside me, make a great combination = wake-up time.

So how many times can I reset myself? How many times can I start over? Try again? Begin Afresh?

The Lord tells us His mercies are new every morning and I think it's the permission I need to hear to be reminded that I can start again, today, now, this very moment.

This journey has been far from perfect. Far from ideal. But what I love is that God has graciously walked with me and shown me new truths and old truths in fresh ways.

Today, I'm choosing to love myself as I am. Not for who I will become but for who I am today. I'm grateful for this body that can move and take me places, that breathes for me, that cycles blood, eliminates toxins, and allows me the nutrition I need to be healthy.

There are so many paths to take when it comes to weight loss. But I know the foundation remains the same- a lifestyle change. Not a quick fix. Not a fast but temporary solution. I know fruits and veggies are key. Drinking plenty of water. Getting enough sleep. Moving my body. Etc.

A friend of mine has lost a lot of weight recently and I'm interested in her success but I recognize I don't if I like all the processed food that goes with it. At the same time I like that she eats regularly (6 times a day) and is burning fat, as opposed to muscle. And she has some serious results!

Do I do Whole 30? Paleo? Keto? Primal? Weight Watchers? NutriSystem? Atkins? South Beach Diet? Shred10? Join my friend on her endeavor?

I know that whatever I choose needs to be sustainable, carried out over a long time. I know it will require planning to various degrees. I know it will mean creating new habits that become routine so I don't have to think all the time about food and what I'm putting in my mouth...

I think that's what exhausts me most is the thinking about food. Do I have enough or too little? Am I starving myself and slowing my metabolism... eating too much that will be stored as fat... having too much sugar, fat, etc?

Taking it one day, one moment, one bite at a time and trusting that God will lead me in the path that is right for me and pleasing to Him.

But I recognize that I still have to accept myself today. I need to give up the self-hatred and practice the self-care and self-love that I am so worthy of... why am I worthy of this? Because I'm made in God's image. And when I take care of myself I'm taking care of God's creation.

I would never treat a friends body the way the I treat my own. I would never allow my children to be so self-destructive as the way I allow myself to be.

So I'm seeking to get comfortable in my own skin. Not that I want to stay the same but I want to rejoice in the fact that I'm fearfully and wonderfully made.

Trusting Him with my scale, with my size, with my goals, with my health- with ALL of me!